Ouch!

Clank’s Report:

I had the most dreadfullest experience yesterday. I went to the hospital and they shaved a bunch of fur off my tummy and my leg and then attached this weird tube thing and I got real tired and fell asleep. Next thing I know, I wake up with the most ginormous band-aid around my middle and my tummy is kinda sore, and my ball is missing! I don’t know what to think of that. Who’d want to steal my ball? It’s not like anybody else could use it or anything.

I had to wait a real long time for Mommy to come get me, and when she got there, I was so ready to go home. She looked real worried about something and she gave me lots of loves, and carried me to the car. I guess she missed me as much as I missed her.

I didn’t get the whole story until we got home and Ratchet explained it to me. It turns out that I didn’t have just the one ball. I had a whole other ball that was growing inside me. And Bianca (my nurse who totally loves Corgis) told Mommy that it was HUGE – the biggest ball they’d ever seen inside a puppy – Labrador size. I guess balls aren’t supposed to grow until they get outside, but this one had another idea.

And then Dr. Kienle told Mommy that it had wandered off into my ‘testines and wrapped around stuff and it was really hard to find and if they hadn’t taken it out it would have been real bad for my digestion (whatever that is). But she found it and now I don’t have a Labrador ball anymore. Ratchet says I can still tell all the guys at Puppy Park that I had the biggest ball in Corgi history. He says I get “bragging rights.” I hope they include cookies with that.

This morning we went back to the hospital and they checked my blood and everything is fine. So they took off my band-aid and I found out I have this really neat scar up my middle. That’s totally cool because I not only have my doggy pirate collar but I have a scar to go with it.

Avast, Matey. Now I think I need a hat.

He Got Ball

Ratchet here to report on a very disturbing development. I’ve been pretty patient about the Wart. I’m a very understanding guy, despite what my Mom might say.

I put up with his annoying habit of waking me from a sound sleep barking about wanting to play chase. I let him nip me on the leg and the chest and the butt until I can’t stand it anymore, and then I chase him down and chew on his ear for awhile, which he seems to like. I’m even willing to overlook his newly acquired habit of latching onto my tail with his teeth so I drag him around the house like a furry caboose.

But I am telling you that I have hit my limit with this latest offense. A few weeks ago I noticed that something smelled different in the house and not in a good way. I traced it back to the Wart, who suddenly was sporting a new appendage. Yep, I know you other dogs know what I’m talking about. While I wasn’t looking he went ahead and sprouted a ball!

Now I do give him a couple points because he’s only got the one, but still. This is just too much for a nice fella like me to bear. How come he gets to have a ball when I haven’t seen mine since I was just a puppy? It is totally unfair.

I told Mom exactly what I thought in no uncertain terms. First she told me to quit barking at the top of my lungs and then she said not to worry about it, it was only temporary. But I’ve been watching this thing and it just keeps getting bigger. Maybe that’s why he doesn’t have two – he’s just going to grow one GIANT BALL. I tell you, it makes a guy nervous just thinking about it.

Well, anyway, Mom told me tonight that Clank is going to see Dr. Kienle tomorrow and when he gets home he won’t have a ball anymore. I sure hope so. I’m a wreck and I don’t know how much longer I can deal with this. Just yesterday he barked at me and his voice dropped at least an octave. I’m worried he’ll start growing and turn into a Rottweiler or something. I’m praying he comes home a nice ball-free Corgi tomorrow afternoon. Whew.

A Visit to the Vet

Clank’s Report:

I got shot on Saturday. …Kidding, boy did I have you going, huh?

I had to go see my doctor at Banfield Pet Hospital & get my final puppy vaccinations. I’ve decided I don’t like shots almost as much as I don’t like getting my temperature taken. What’s with sticking something up my butt? Don’t people know that’s where stuff is supposed to come out, not go in?

The cool thing was that Ratchet came along this time so he could meet Dr. Kienle. She’s my doctor and she’s the greatest. She totally loves Corgis and has a Pembroke girl of her own. Ratchet says he’ll overlook the Pembroke thing since she’s so nice and is thinking of getting a Cardigan after meeting us.

She gave me a cookie for being a good boy and Ratchet got one ‘cause he made his ears perk up for her. That part was fun, so I guess going to the vet isn’t all bad.